Artvoice Columns
Jump: Getting a Grip • You Auto Know • Peace Bridge ChroniclesGetting a Grip by Michael I. Niman
Reboot America! (Artvoice v8n11)
A local income tax prep company has ads on TV showing a family wearing sweaters and cozying up around the fireplace to stay warm, and a man dressed up in a business suit grabbing his briefcase and mounting his bike to head off to work. The narrator reassures us that no, we wouldn’t have to “go to extremes” to save money, like wearing sweaters in the winter or riding a bike to work. We could instead save cash by letting them prepare our tax returns.The Plane Crash and The Pundit (Artvoice v8n10)
When I fly, I feel that I’m home when I get to the last gate and wait to board that final flight back to Buffalo. I always imagine that, even with no signage, I could find the gate by looking at the people beginning to gather. This is our community. Maybe I’m imagining it, but the folks at the gate seem to be a distinctive Buffalonian mix.Consumption (Artvoice v8n8)
Over a century ago we used the term “consumption” to refer to tuberculosis, because it consumed its victims. Today the term is more commonly applied to our consumer-based culture—an entity we’re learning is far more deadly than tuberculosis. Our culture of consumption doesn’t simply kill its unwitting victims, happy in their materialist orgy.Between the Left and Right Lies the Middle (Artvoice v8n6)
The motto at WNED, our local National Public Radio news station, is “Somewhere between the left and the right lies the truth—that’s where you’ll find us.” I’ve always been annoyed by this trite bit of self-aggrandizement.Ponzi Capitalism (Artvoice v7n52)
Two names have been wed in the news this month: Charles Ponzi, the con artist busted in 1920, and Bernard Madoff, one of America’s most successful hedge fund managers and a reputable pillar of the Wall Street financial community.Union Dues (Artvoice v7n50)
First off, let me begin this column by reminding folks that that I have no love for the Big Three Automakers. These are the people who purposefully bought and killed mass transit systems in the 1940s, engineered planned obsolescence in the 1950s and 1960s, and knowingly sold deadly cars in the 1970s when their number-crunchers figured it was cheaper to pay a few wrongful death settlements then to issue a safety recall.No You Can't (Artvoice v7n49)
In one of our nation’s longest shameful chapters, the US maintained anti-miscegenation laws on the books until 1967. Varying from state to state, these rules made it a crime for whites and various groups of non-whites, such as black folks and Native Americans, to marry.State of Stupidity (Artvoice v7n48)
For most of my life it’s felt as if all branches of government have been held hostage by the chronically unimaginative. Take the current New York State budget crisis, for example. We’re spiraling toward bankruptcy because 20 percent of state revenue derives from Wall Street—and that money just plain ain’t there anymore. It’s yet another d’uh moment.Class Warfare (Artvoice v7n47)
Class is the invisible signifier. In the United States, we just don’t speak of it, unless, of course, we’re talking about the ubiquitous “middle class,” with which we’re all supposed to identify. This all changed with “Joe the Plumber from Ohio,” who was actually a man named Sam who worked as a plumber’s helper after moving to Ohio from Arizona.The Bullet We Dodged (Artvoice v7n46)
The scariest costume worn to my door this past Halloween was a tiny Sarah Palin outfit. This was a week after the real Palin went on record in an NBC interview arguing that those who would bomb healthcare facilities that provided abortions weren’t necessarily “terrorists.” No tykes ever showed up at our doors pining for Hershey bars dressed as “pro-life” doctor killer James Kopp.Keeping McCain in the Game (Artvoice v7n43)
American elections are won not by the best qualified, the most educated, the more experienced, articulate, levelheaded, or intelligent candidate, but by the candidate who raises and spends the most money on political advertising. This reality has proven itself over and over again in the vast majority of local, state, and national elections for the past two generations.Chumps & Champs (Artvoice v7n40)
Let’s use a simple analogy to explain the financial meltdown: I take your money to the casino and start playing roulette. If I win, I keep the profits. I’m a champ. If I lose, you lose your money.A Pig in Poke (Artvoice v7n38)
Okay. Let’s get something straight. If, for example, you tell me that the Republican ticket will bring “real change” to the Republican-controlled White House, and I respond by saying, “That dog won’t hunt,” I am not calling Sarah Palin a “dog.” I’m simply using a folksy colloquial expression.Four More Years of "Change" (Artvoice v7n37)
More and more, every election season, when we tune into the media it seems like someone keeps hitting the “replay” button. Take this year’s Republican coronation of John McCain. We’ve seen this dog-and-pony show before. Specifically, we saw it in 2000, when George W. Bush ran for president—the same slogans, same promises, and same candidate packaging.Like "Pain" But With an "L" (Artvoice v7n36)
There’s a lot of murmur and speculation about John McCain’s weird, “out of right field” choice for a vice presidential running mate. I envision an 11th-hour decision scenario something like this: McCain watches the TV broadcast of Barack Obama accepting the Democratic Party’s nomination for president live in front of 60,000 swing state voters. And suddenly McCain realizes Obama’s talking about him—sometimes unkindly.McCain's First War (Artvoice v7n34)
Here’s the skinny on this war: It’s got nothing to do with peaches or NASCAR. The Russians aren’t following Robert E. Lee’s route through Dixie to Washington, DC. Our Georgia is fine, more or less. The Russia-Georgia war is essentially an aftershock from the “you go your way, we go ours” Soviet divorce.Beavis & Butthead's Father Runs For President (Artvoice v7n33)
I finally watched Idiocracy, the sci-fi humor movie about evolution working in reverse, degrading the human species through excessive breeding of idiots. The movie takes place 500 years into the future when the most popular TV show is called “Ow My Balls!”Weirdos Riot: What's Wrong With the Buffalo News? (Artvoice v7n29)
10 US Forest Service police officers arrest a man in Wyoming for crime of being “uncooperative.” Add the freak show specter of “eccentrics” and “hippie types” throwing rocks and sticks, however, and in the era of Jerry Springer, you’ve got the makings of a national news story. Hence, nearly 2,000 miles away, the Buffalo News ran the story under the headline, “5 arrested in Rainbow Family clash with feds.”Are We Ready To Vote Yet? (Artvoice v7n25)
When future historians sit down to study this era, archived media stories will be of little use to them, unless the Brad Pitt-Angela Jolie baby grows up to rule the world. Probably the biggest history-making story to be ignored by the corporate media this month is the introduction in the US Congress of Articles of Impeachment against George W. Bush.McCain and the Doomsday Mob (Artvoice v7n22)
Two months ago, on March 27 to be exact, I wrote about John McCain’s pastors—John Hagee and Rod Parsley. I cited a few of their juicier quotes: stuff about our upcoming divine nuclear war to destroy Islam, how god finally stuck it to New Orleans, jokes about selling black slaves, how we gotta pop a thermonuclear cap in Russia, how Muslims have a spiritual mandate to kill Christians and Jews—that kind of stuff.Reflections on Dandelions (Artvoice v7n20)
My columns usually focus on doom and damnation. You know—end-of-the-world stuff. That’s because it is the end of the world.Food Fight (Artvoice v7n19)
From Haiti to Laos, people are starving—but they won't do it quietly.Never Apologize to Goons and Thugs (Artvoice v7n17)
Last week CNN’s Jack Cafferty, in an on-air editorial, called the goons and thugs that run China’s one party state “goons and thugs.” And right on cue, these autocrats—the ones who still hold survivors of their 1989 massacre of nonviolent, pro-democracy activists locked away in a mysterious gulag system replete with slave labor factories—proved Cafferty right, demanding that CNN retract his remarks and apologize to the offended goons and thugs.After Bush: Truth and Reconciliation (Artvoice v7n16)
I think historians eventually will mark the effective start of the George W. Bush presidency as September 12, 2001. Up until that point, the only historically distinguishing feature of the Bush reign was W.’s record-setting vacation time at his ranch. Until the morning of September 11, the whole neo-con cabal was pretty much stuck in the mud, wheels spinning with the agenda splattering on the back fender. After September 11, just as after the bombing of the Reichstag, it was another story.John McCain's Pastors (Artvoice v7n13)
In another Fox News agenda-setting moment, the GOP’s propaganda wing has successfully shifted the election focus away from our endless wars and our imploding economy and environment, over to Barack Obama’s pastor.The Harder They Come, The Harder They Fall (Artvoice v7n12)
To put the Spitzer prostitution scandal into perspective, let me go back two decades to when I first started teaching college—back when Eliot Spitzer was a young upstart district attorney. I was teaching an alternative media course to, I always suspected, a class that included a number of potheads. I asked my students a question that I told them I didn’t actually want them to answer aloud—but just think about the answer: “How many of you have dealt dope?”Want Change? (Artvoice v7n10)
This primary season we’re seeing civic engagement on a level we haven’t witnessed for a generation. My 16-year-old niece and her friends are phone-banking for Barack Obama. People who have never participated in the electoral process are getting stoked. Primary turnout is at blockbuster levels. After two decades of post-Reagan apathy and civic disengagement, this distraction from consumerism might well save our struggling democracy.Hillary W. Bush's War (Artvoice v7n9)
Try this one out on your friends and family. Ask them to name all the wars that we’ve fought or funded since they were born. Few Americans can do this. Think about it. So many wars and so few concerns. Why do these wars start? How do they end? Do they end? Who gives a damn? Britney’s trying to have a baby.It's Hush Money, Baby (Artvoice v7n7)
If the American economy had a dashboard, all the gauges would be oscillating wildly—the engine overheating, the fuel tank empty, the speedometer pinned and the door ajar light blinking.935 Lies (Artvoice v7n6)
After years of changing rationales, justifications and reasons as to why the US invaded Iraq, we seem to have reached a national consensus: We invaded Iraq because people told lies.Finishing in the Money (Artvoice v7n4)
It’s Clinton (the media likes to call her Hillary because she’s a girl) and Obama neck and neck at the first turn, pulling away from the pack. Obama’s out front by a nose. It’s Obama by a head. It looks like Obama’s got it. But wait—here’s Clinton on the outside neck and neck with Obama in the final turn. Now she’s pulling ahead at the wire. And it’s Clinton, our winner by a Diebold nose. Wow, what a race. And what a smart dresser she is.Flavor and Politics (Artvoice v6n50)
More money is spent globally on coffee than on any other tradable commodity with the exception of oil. How that money is spent is one of the most important social indicators as to who we are as a global society.Shopping at the End of the World (Artvoice v6n48)
In a consumer culture life is all about you. What are your immediate wants and needs? How do you feel? Are you comfortable? Thirsty maybe? Mood okay? Happiness comes in a box from the mall. Or a pill from the doctor. Whatever.
Jump: Top of Page • Getting a Grip • You Auto Know • Peace Bridge Chronicles
You Auto Know by Jim Corbran
Below is a summary of Jim Corbran's weekly print edition columns; he is also a frequent contributor on the AV Daily blog. If you'd like to read more from Jim, click here.
Electrifying News From Chrysler (Artvoice v8n9)
Not all the news coming out of Chrysler these days is bad. We can only hope (for their sake) that the good news isn’t too little too late. This year’s Detroit auto show provided the backdrop for the unveiling of the ailing company’s plug-in, range-extended hybrid 200C EV.The Obamabile (Artvoice v8n7)
Not everyone in this troubled economy is having a hard time putting new wheels in their driveway. If you watched any of the recent presidential inauguration, you probably saw the new 2009 Cadillac limousine make its Washington debut. The car succeeds a 2004 Cadillac DTS limousine originally commissioned for President George W. Bush.Lights of the Detroit Auto Show (Artvoice v8n5)
If anyone had any doubts about the state of the auto industry, a walk around this year’s North American International Auto Show (NAIAS) would have clued them in real fast. Although no attendance figures have been released, I didn’t bump into nearly as many people as usual this year, even at the most popular exhibits.State of the Auto Industry (Artvoice v8n3)
I don’t claim to be an expert on the auto industry, although I do play one on these pages. I do, however, claim to be a fan.Be The First On Your Block. . . (Artvoice v7n50)
As someone who’s out there driving for a living, I often find myself straining to stay entertained. One of the games I play I call “Who’s Driving What?” This is where I pull into one of my regular stops and try to figure out which person inside belongs to which vehicle in the parking lot.This year's best Christmas gift on four wheels (Artvoice )
Okay, I tried this a few years back with the new Rolls-Royce Phantom, but a quick, unscientific survey (country clubs, Buffalo Bills’ employee lot, a chat with the valet parkers at the annual plumbers’ union picnic) told me that no one took my simple suggestion: a $320,000 car as the ultimate Christmas gift.Colorful Language (Artvoice v7n46)
Sometimes going through life with an English degree hanging on my wall is a curse. And I don’t mean only on pay days. I often find myself reading ads, signs, and even professionally written press releases, and scratching my head. Don’t these people have editors?Future? Tense. (Artvoice v7n41)
I hate to sound whiney (okay, maybe I don’t really hate it that much) but I’m disappointed in the latest crop of concept vehicles making the auto show circuit. C’mon, where’s the excitement? The glamour?New (& Improved?) (Artvoice v7n39)
For those of you who haven’t been following along, this is my 10th year writing the new model year column (in one paper or another), and my, how things have changed. Back then trucks and SUVs were kings of the hill; now they’re more like the brother-in-law who was dispatched to an ambassadorship of some faraway nation.Car-Buying on eBay: Yikes! (Artvoice v7n37)
"Shop in your underwear!” one billboard used to read for a local car dealer. It was referring of course to the fact that its inventory was online and could be browsed in the comfort of your own home—in your underwear (or not).The Long & Short of It (Artvoice v7n34)
The long of it being the new 2009 Hyundai Genesis, the Korean automaker’s dipping of the toe into the premium luxury sedan market.The Times They Have A-Changed (Artvoice v7n30
Finally. Finally. It took gas prices reaching the dreaded four-dollar-a-gallon mark to make North American auto manufacturers realize…realize what? That we North Americans will only buy things we really don’t need as long as we can still afford them?Fit to be Tried: The 2009 Honda Fit (Artvoice v7n29)
Now you’d think, that in these times of high gas prices, if you’re sitting pretty with a vehicle in your showrooms which is practical, reliable, and gets a combined EPA mileage figure of over 30 miles per gallo—you’d think you’d keep that research and development money in the bank and just keep sellin’ cars. Why waste that hard-earned stockholders’ cash on new models when you’re already selling everything you can build?The 2008 Rendezvous: Vive La Différence! (Artvoice v7n27)
I’m sure most of you have heard of the party game “Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon.” The actor, in an interview some years ago, claimed to have worked with everyone in Hollywood, or with someone who had worked with them. Three college students turned the braggadocio’s remark into the game where players try and link different people (or things, I guess) to each other in six steps or less.The "SW" Word (Artvoice v7n23)
Last column’s look at convertibles got me thinking about different body styles which have come and gone in and out of favor over the years. One of the most maligned over the past couple of decades has been the station wagon.A Little Off The Top (Artvoice v7n21)
It’s that time of year again... almost. Even though I’ve seen convertibles driving around town with their tops down on and off for weeks now, most of those instances were during freakishly warm weather pockets. After living in Western New York just about all of my life, I realize true convertible season doesn’t usually start until around Memorial Day.A Car That Runs on Compressed Air (Artvoice v7n19)
I’ve got to admit that when I first came across this story in Britain’s Car Magazine I immediately dismissed it. After all, it was in the April issue, and I figured it was just another April Fool’s joke.Two Arms and a Leg... and Counting (Artvoice v7n17)
Time was when when spending an arm and a leg actually got you something. Sad to say those days are long gone and not likely to return. As I write this, today I spent $3.64 for gas; I’m sure as you read this it’s even higher.Way Off Broadway: The 2008 New York Auto Show (Artvoice v7n15)
Although I always enjoy the annual Buffalo auto show, once you’ve been to a real auto show (Detroit, New York, Frankfort…), the local show pales in comparison. Heck, it pales even if you’ve never been to another show.Timing, Timing, Timing: The 2009 Toyota Corolla (Artvoice v7n13)
You hear it over and over again in the real estate business: “Location, location, location.” In the car biz, it’s more like timing. Timing, and a huge dose of luck and/or talent. Toyota’s tenth generation Corolla couldn’t come along at a better time.There Will Be Stares (Artvoice v7n9)
You immediately get the idea that the smart fortwo is out to save you money—check out that all-lower-case name. Everyone knows capital letters cost more! Another clue is its “half-a-car” size. I’ll tell you one thing, though: Prepare to be looked at—big time—when driving this fun little car.Sounds of the Auto Show (Artvoice v7n7)
Walking around this year’s Buffalo Auto Show got me thinking how things have changed over the years. Particularly the sound systems available in some of the new cars.Understanding the Concept (Artvoice v7n5)
If the just-concluded North American International Auto Show proved anything, it’s that America still doesn’t get it. While the Frankfurt, Germany show this past fall seemed to focus on the greening of the European auto industry, the big stars of the Detroit show seemed to be the restyled Ford F-150 and Dodge Ram pickups, Chevy’s 600-hp, $100,000 Corvette and Cadillac’s new 500-horsepower CTS-V. Hardly the news we’ve been waiting for as we face higher and higher gas prices.Here's the New Malibu, Barbie (Artvoice v7n3)
With a nod to my wife, who’s always been a huge Barbie fan, we get to this week’s subject, Chevy’s new Malibu. This could possibly be one of, if not the, most important cars General Motors has put in a showroom in years.
Jump: Top of Page • Getting a Grip • You Auto Know • Peace Bridge Chronicles
Peace Bridge Chronicles by Bruce Jackson
Who Shrank the Peace Bridge? (Artvoice v7n18)
How a bird-brained notion has put us in the weeds again.Ron Rienas: "We Were Never in Front Park" (Artvoice v7n4)
How a bird-brained notion has put us in the weeds again.Ron Rienas: "It's Not About Trucks" (Artvoice v7n3)
Every day there are emails about the Peace Bridge—some days three or four of them—from the Columbus Avenue homeowners group. The list of recipients is organic, growing larger week by week. One mailing for January 12 had 73 recipients. It included every local politician of note, local staffers for the area’s senators and members of Congress, the Buffalo News, Artvoice, WBFO, Don Esmonde, two Sam Hoyt staffers, Mylous Hairston and one member of the PBA.Trucking Buffalo (Artvoice v6n42)
Truck traffic on the Peace Bridge is up as a result of NAFTA and it is expected to increase in decades to come. Passenger car traffic, on the other hand, is down, and is expected to decline even more when the new border personal identification requirements go into effect. The border is ever less friendly to people, more friendly to raw materials and manufactured goods.
Jump: Top of Page • Getting a Grip • You Auto Know • Peace Bridge Chronicles
Subscribe 