GReY matter

On Grey’s Anatomy, I saw an episode about a man who made his heart condition worse in order to move up the list for a transplant. have a friend who’s waiting for a transplant. Would it be right to suggest this to him? Is it so wrong?

—Dr. Feel Bad

The Practical Cogitator: Okay, here’s the thing: I learned how to drive in a demolition derby from watching Happy Days. I thought I was an expert, so I signed up to be in a real one at the Erie County Fair about 20 years ago, and I got my ass kicked, and had a fractured wrist and broken cheekbone to show for it. The lesson I learned was “That box in the living room is not, in fact, imparting wisdom for the ages. At least not on Happy Days.” I’m willing to bet that Grey’s Anatomy isn’t really qualified to be handing out advice, either. And so I think you should just keep your diabolically clever transplant schemes to yourself; your friend has enough on his mind already. How about you just take him out to lunch, instead.

Ruthless says: Having never watched an episode of that incomprehensibly popular drivel, I’m not entirely sure what you’re suggesting. How, exactly, does one go about making one’s heart condition worse? (Extra salt? Smoking crack? What are we talking about here?)

In order to educate myself, I consulted some Grey’s Anatomy blogs, and jackpot! This here was apparently written by a real doctor, sounding off with a recent post to Medical Myth Busters, entitled “Penetrating ‘Grey’s Anatomy’”:

I cannot even begin to explain to you how ridiculously unbelievable a scenario this whole “lets fake kill the patient to get him a heart” thing is. Honestly, there are no words to explain how ridiculous this is. Where are the nurses? The techs? The dude who brings the food? Another human being who might have an inkling something is going on? No words. My head might explode.

And that, dear reader, is a lot like how I felt when I read your question.

be fruitful & Multiply

I have a little ethical dilemma about a man I know. He has, and I am being serious, over 20 children, by a variety of different mothers. I want to support autonomy and the freedom to have kids, but this guy makes me want the power to sterilize people. Am I a eugenicist?

—Zero Growth

The Practical Cogitator: In short: yes. You are being eugenicist. So you stop this guy—what’s to stop you from preventing unmarried women from having children? People of different races? Different sexualities? Dumb people? All that’s been tried, and more, and not by people you want on your side.

There’s a price to pay for freedom, thought it’s not what the bumper stickers say. It’s that you have to love living in a world that grants folks the chance to make choices and to be people that you don’t necessarily like.

Ruthless says: In my mind, there’s nothing that interferes with freedom and autonomy quite like an enormous brood of children. Granted, he doesn’t likely live with them all—or even any of them—but in that case, how could he possibly be paying child support to all the different “baby mamas” and still have any money to live on? Either way I can only imagine he has forfeited at least some amount of freedom and autonomy already. Somebody should save him from himself. Myself, I’d heed this piece of advice given by a wise and happy parent of two: “Never let ’em outnumber you.”

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