Designated Drivers

A Lancaster man whose license was revoked for previous DUI convictions was arrested late on Mar. 25 and charged for driving a lawnmower while drunk. Joseph Simme, 47, blew a 0.14 on his BAC test and is currently facing felony charges.

Alex Rodriguez

The New York Yankees All-Star (and admitted juicer) was a no-show in Buffalo on Mar. 26 after it was reported he would meet with FBI officials in Buffalo as a witness in the performance-enhancing drugs probe of his Canadian doctor.

Inner Rage

At a Mar. 27 Tea Party protest at Erie Canal Harbor, developer and gubernatorial candidate Carl Paladino channeled his inner Howard Beale, leading the crowd in chants of “I’m mad as hell and I’m not going to take it anymore.”

Hollywood East

Famous actor (and friend of controversial politico Steve Pigeon) James Woods was in town on Mar. 27 to scout locations for a “Middle American” film he’s producing. When Hollywood needs blue collar, it’s nice to know they think of us.

Domestic Partners

By a vote of 8-1, the Buffalo Common Council approved a measure on Mar. 30 to extend benefits to city employees in same-sex domestic partnerships. As part of a compromise, however, unmarried opposite sex couples were excluded from eligibility.

Millions of dollars the city of Buffalo owes the Federal Emergency Management Agency for their response to the October storm of 2006, according to a federal audit released on Mar. 26. According to the report, the city failed to wait a week—as suburban governments did—and therefore overpaid for debris removal. City officials, who have a $44 million emergency fund, have said that they will fight the decision.