Barbara Bouchey gives her own take on Keith Raniere on Megyn Kelly

This past week, former NXIVM High-Rank Barbara Bouchey appeared on Megyn Kelly Today show on NBC TV and offered millions of viewers an interesting perspective on Keith Raniere and NXIVM.

Because we get so few alternate perspectives on Raniere on this blog – so few defend him –  this particular commentary, coming from an intimate companion of his, is especially insightful.

Bouchey said in part on television:

NXIVM was so life-changing and profound. Keith actually taught more than half of the program because it was new…

I [was] very much in love with Keith, very much aligned with the philosophy and really had experienced the changes within me…

So I began helping Keith and Nancy develop infrastructure. And organizational skills. And sales and marketing material and helping to train people…

Dating Keith Raniere did not look like going to dinner or a weekend at the beach. Keith did not do those kinds of social things.

I drove Keith to all the events. He slept at my house three or four nights a week. People would move over if they were sitting on the couch next to him to let me sit next to him…

I was his soul mate, his companion and his significant girlfriend…

I didn’t know for a year that anyone else was with him [sexually].

Barbara also said she knew about three of the women that Raniere was sleeping with while they were together – and that she later found out that he slept with a total of 12 such women.

I gave it the girl scout try…

The attraction [to NXIVM] was that it was transformational, inspirational curriculum, the material. The people who taught the workshop were amazing extraordinary people.

Everyday-people would go in and take a workshop and it was life changing…

I developed and created Vanguard Week as an annual conference more so than to celebrate his birthday…

Keith was a very dynamic person, soft-spoken, engaging… funny…He could play the piano…

Was he smart?  What I observed was he is a very intelligent man who was very skilled at many things…

I thought I was the only one and his soul mate for a good year…I found out about someone…[he had sex with a couple times a year as a teacher-student sexual relationship]…I only knew about a few of them [that he had sex with]. They all knew about each other…I didn’t find out about nine of them until after I left…

I was integral in helping create the company…plus he loved me allegedly…I couldn’t tell – I walked in the room and everybody made way for me  I was his girlfriend.

See the entire interview and learn more about Barbara Bouchey’s perspective,



This photo was aired on Megyn Kelly of Barbara, Keith, and Nancy Salzman – or, as they preferred to be called, Ya, Vanguard and Prefect
Were they soulmates? Barbara thought they were for a time.












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Frank Parlato


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  • Barbara never saw the light or left for any noble reasons.

    Look at her face, for crying out loud. It’s water logged. She’s got a double chin and cheeks like a pumpkin. She’s been whipped with an ugly stick.

    She’s nearly a Chris Farley look-alike. She’s butt ugly now. Not even Viagra could help a man get wood for that creature. Yuck.

    She just didn’t age very well.

    Even 10 years ago she was over-the-hill and no longer as pretty as she was in that younger photo.

    Make no mistake, Barbara only left NXIVM after she lost her status and power as Keith’s main sex girl.

    She left NXIVM (and Keith) only when her aging-fat-ass was no longer a tempting sexual treat for Vanguard and her status had dwindled to that of a gofer or a Pam Cafritz drone.

    She left for the most vain reason of all, her own lost ego.

    She never saw the light or left NXIVM for noble reasons.

    Barbara is a she-snake of the worst variety, a person with no integrity whatsoever (even worse than Flowers). I don’t know why Frank talks nicely of Barbara, she’s done nothing for anybody except herself. I honestly hope that God takes a huge shit on her one day.

  • Barbara loved him that’s all. A woman loves that’s what they do. She loved him once and forever. You could see it on Megan Kelly. She loves Keith and is still in love with him. Desperately. She’s the type I think who would wait for him to get out of prison.

    • I agree Barbara still loves him. Once a soul mate always. Soul mates are forever. What’s wrong with that anyway? So she still loves him, it shows her faithfulness. Her strength. Her loyalty. Maybe he is the weak one. Maybe Barbara is the strong one. The one he will come back to when he gets out of prison even if it is 20 years.

      • I think that even once you find out someone you deeply loved is a traitor, user, even sociopath, part of the brain does not want to believe it. It take a lot of time and absence. It might be hard for Barbara to overcome with all the reminders of KR everywhere, in the news. My guess is she remember what she once thought he was.

      • – The one he will come back to when he gets out of prison even if it is 20 years.


        You obviously don’t understand narcissistic sociopathy. You obviously don’t understand the concept of love or soul mates. There is no such thing as one-sided love. Love has always been mutual. It can fluctuate, increase, decrease, etc., but once it’s gone from one side at any level, it no longer exists. To hold onto it as such is nothing but delusion. Thus, there can also be no one-sided soul mate relationship since it is the highest form of love shared between two people. If love is not one-sided, then a soul mate relationship cannot be so by necessity. VanDouche is indifferent to the soul mate concept. It doesn’t exist in his mind as something realizable for himself. It is but a concept used as a tool to manipulate a woman who believes in such an ideal. Love is *always* manifested in action. Whether it is waiting for someone or being there for them. It is more than mere words.

        There is no coming back from what VanDouche has become. I’d feel sorry for what he has become and would wish rectification and reform upon him but judging from his own words and actions, he obviously has no sense of remorse. At all. According to a previous article Mr. Parlato posted, he still believes he did nothing wrong and will get off.

  • Mrs. Just Sayin’ has been trying to convince others that she’s repulsed by Keith’s misogynistic view of women.

    Yet she already admitted that she KNEW that her $5k-$10k NXIVM intensive fees were being waived by Keith precisely because she was on the “pretty girl scholarship” (which means she UNDERSTOOD that she was given free access to a NXIVM intensive for the sole purpose of flaunting her poontang for Keith’s eyes and to dangle her feminine candy for master Vanguard, in exchange for having her fees waived).

    She *knew* ahead of time what her purpose for going to the intensive was, yet she still went anyway.

    Or in other words, she purposely fed into Keith’s misogynistic view that women are good for nothing else except tempting men with their womanly fruit.

    It doesn’t matter whether she gave up the pussy to Keith or just let him gaze at her feminine candy from the podium and then denied him his womanly fruit. She still attended that intensive with the sole purpose of dangling that shit for Keith’s eyes (in exchange for having her fees waived).

    But yet *now* she claims that other members are the real misogynists?

    Repent woman. Repent for your unholy sins of flaunting your female candy for Vanguard and embracing his misogynistic view that women are sex objects, just so you could save some money with the pretty girl scholarship. 🙂

    • That was a lot to say for assuming that she didn’t simply start calling it so *after* she found out its real motives.

      • I started calling it that after I found out I wasn’t the only attractive young woman to attend an intensive for free, and it is quite clear now why that happens.

        The bully is just attacking me because I pointed out he is a bully. All bullies are just sad, hurting, little children inside who lash out and try to hurt others. It’s sad, really.

    • How many female students got free or discount intensives for being pretty? How many had sex with Raniere? Would women recruit these women for the sole purpose of having sex with Raniere?

      • I absolutely believe that Keith would instruct people to recruit attractive girls / young women.
        I was offered the intensive by a guy that I was friends with for about 8 months before he offered the “opportunity” to attend the intensive for free.
        I think I probably could have continued on past the five days if I had been interested, whether it was going to be free or the start of an indentured servitude, I will never know because what went on in the first five days was so horrific, I was never going to stick around to find out.
        I suppose I should be grateful to Christine Collins for that.

  • Question for Pea Onyu: Does it hurt when you pee? What you call a “disintegration” is what normal people call infidelity. Is it a “disintegration” to have a choice that opposes Raniere? Or what if Keith brings a person with treatment resistant gonorrhia into your fold? You seem to be willing to forfeit your liberty and even your life to a person who…fled to Mexico? I am sad for you folks.

  • Barbara did not know about the other 9. She knew about 3. Keith taught her by degrees to share. She doesn’t own his penis. Her issue was that while 3 was fine 12 was too many. Why? It was her issue. He still spent nights with her. He let her drive him to volleyball. We were all told to let her sit next to him because she had entitlement issues. But Keith was teaching us. He would always tell us that we had to accept all her issues and that she could not know about all of us since she had too many issues. By using BB’s issues he explained and tiaght us not to be jealous.

    • Did you have a go on little Keith’s penis Pea? How small is it? I assume around four inches. Is that accurate?

      The only women Keithy boy ever fucked were ugly women with low self esteem, pimped out to him by other brain dead women. If you are such an expert on Raniere’s sexual conquests, name one good looking woman he fucked.

      Other than Allison Mack who is clearly mad, did he fuck any other actresses?

      Did Kristin Kreuk experience little Keith’s penis?

      What about Kristanna Loken?

      If you are really an expert on little Keith, you would be able to provide information.

      • The women all had spiritual beauty and of course some weee stunning like me. As for his prowess let me just say he is tops.

        • That didn’t answer the question did it? Names, or you are a lier. Not “spiritual beauty” whatever the fuck that means. Beauty that non-NXIVM would notice.

        • Keith has really groomed his harem members to like pudgy soft men with teenie weenies. Keith also groomed his women to think they have a disintegration if they want to be in a monogamous relationship. Instead, the majority of his harem members are all unmarried, have forfeited any chance of having children, let alone getting married, and think it’s OK to not have the devotion of one man who is solely committed to them; to go out on dates and do fun things together. To be seen in public arm in arm. To go on vacation together. To come home every day/night to one devoted man with whom they can go to bed with every night. To snuggle with every night. And Keith taught all of these women that there is something wrong with them if they want such a life. How sad. I have experience with Keith and I thank my lucky stars I was too stubborn (and cleary very smart and wise) to have gotten wrapped up in his warped world. One time I was sad and didn’t know my place in the world and wanted something bigger and better out of life. Keith tried to latch onto that. I dodged a bullet. Let’s just say I didn’t need him to make me fulfilled. I now have things Keith’s harem members will never have.I feel sorry for these women in some ways, because they were all good people to start out. We were all the same, really. We all had low self-esteem, and wanted something bigger out of life and wanted to make the world a better place. Sadly, the opposite has happened for these women. And Keith messed them up so badly that they can’t even see that. Instead, they perpetuate his evil. It’s sad that one creepy man has had that much power to ruin so many women. Best of luck Pea Onyu. You were probably once a lovely person. I actually do hope that most of you come to the realization some day that Keith is a bad person and that you heal and can move on to a healthy and happy life without Keith; perhaps with a partner who will treat you as his one and only queen and be devoted to you and only you. If you’re too old to bear children yourself, perhaps you can adopt.

  • Stop picking on Barbara. She loves him. He was her soul master not soul mate and her teacher. Barbara is wise just went astray. She must come back to him. She is too old to be lover but she can join the other older ones like Karen and Lauren etc. and find newer ones to be spiritual wives. This is natural on our siloed relatinhsos woty our master. Babs still loves him and based on what she says she’s coming back. Just waiting for him to be acquired.

    • Spiritual wife – what a load of crap. Too old to have sex with the creepy one, but yet she has made a lifelong commitment to Keith, and therefore can’t have sex with anyone else, and instead has to find new young recruits for her spiritual husband. So an older spiritual wife has to be celibate, continue to maintain a starvation diet (she can’t even find an outlet in good food!), run errands and clean house for Keith, do Keith’s dirty and illegal work, and go to bed every night knowing the pretty young recruit is the one wrapping her legs around Keith’s pudgy body instead her. What a great, fulfilling life that must be! Well, your spiritual husband will be in jail for many decades. What will you do with your life while he resides at a federal or state prison?

  • I hope this woman can eventually recover from her association with Raniere. I knew him too – and managed to leave when it became clear to me that my “soulmate” was an abusive, manipulative, lying piece of trash. It’s hard to accept that you were nothing but a game to someone you cared deeply about and who said you were special to them. In the end, you’ve got to be able to look them in the eyes and admit there is no love there, and go find it elsewhere. The only photos I have ever seen of Raniere with someone he maybe “loved” in his own spectacularly disturbed way were with Pam Cafritz and Toni Natalie. In photos with anyone else, he has dead lizard eyes – nothing but cold calculation there. I didn’t bother to keep any photos of him with me, but I’m pretty sure the dead lizard would have been staring back at me as well.

    Let it go, Barbara – help the Feds put the bastard behind bars permanently and then find some other way to fill the holes in your life.

    • Keith Raniere is a devil. It is good that you saw the light. Out of curiosity, when were you involved with this prick? I would imagine as NXIVM grew, the more he got his ass kissed and the more women became obsessed with him.

    • Great, now flowers / mike and / or Scott or whomever is copying my name.

      I did not say that. Never trust anybody posting with my name and putting a link up.

        • Yes, it did.

          But you’re still a hypocrite for feeding into Keith’s misogynistic view of women as sex objects — by using your pretty girl scholarship to flaunt your womanly fruit for master Vanguard’s eyes, then accusing others of being misogynists. lol

          You don’t sound real bright. Maybe time to attend a class in Logic 101. 🙂

  • INFLATION ALERT! That old saying about a picture being worth a thousand words greatly underestimates the value of the picture at the top of this post. You truly are a glory-whore.

  • Great job, Barb. In addition to unnecessarily admitting that you are complicit in a number of criminal activities – kind of like when you voluntarily admitted that you decided to access NXIVM’s website several months after Toni Natalie, Joe O’Hara and John Tighe had been arrested for allegedly doing the same thing – you also managed to sing the praises of the cult and Keith Raniere.

    When I first read this post, I wondered why Frank had written so many negative things about you. Then I went back and re-watched the Megyn Kelly show and realized that all he did is repeat things that you had actually said.

    It’s fascinating to watch you try to re-write your history with the cult – especially all the parts you simply never mention. Like how much money you made from all the people you recruited – and all the fees you earned for managing the Bronfmans’ trust funds.

    Here’s a very simple question for you Barbara: Did you earn more from recruiting fess and money management fees than you lost in covering Raniere’s initial foray into the commodities market?

    And speaking of the commodities market, how is it that you – as the Bronfman sisters’ financial planner – didn’t warn them that Raniere had no idea what he was doing in the commodities market? Didn’t you have a fiduciary duty to tell them that? And did you reinforce his “explanation” that the reason he lost $56 million of their money is because their father was manipulating the markets against him?

    C’mon, Barb, inquiring minds want to know!

  • One other note to Barbara and any potential “takers” with a mind to repackage and resell any NXIVM components —

    The NXIVM slogan: “He who has the most joy wins” was coined and penned by yours truly. It was originally, “SHE who has the most joy wins.”

    It’s a twist on the biblical verse: “Man is that he might have Joy” combined with a popular bumper sticker slapped on expensive cars and boats back in the day that read:

    “He who dies with the most toys wins.”

    I wrote it, Keith stole it and, later, wired 10k into my bank account for seed money to leave my husband and join his new business, ESP/NXIVM. When I left my husband but didn’t join NXIVM, nor agree to have sex with Keith, he claimed the money was payment for the slogan.

    Given Keith’s propensity (or need — given his creative authenticity deficits) to not only plagiarize but pervert original material, I’d be very careful about what “goodies” you snatch from the NXIVM technology in any new venture as well as your claims to the media that you, not Keith, were the intellectual property thief.

    • – I wrote it, Keith stole it and, later, wired 10k into my bank account for seed money to leave my husband and join his new business, ESP/NXIVM. When I left my husband but didn’t join NXIVM, nor agree to have sex with Keith, he claimed the money was payment for the slogan.

      I’m curious. Does VanDouche do this with all the women he wants to form a business or develop an idea with, i.e., proposition them for sex? I say that tongue in cheek because I’m pretty sure the latter comes before the former. How does he go about doing this, i.e., what’s his method or means? What happens then if a women refuses to sleep with him?

  • Part of what deeply disturbs me about NXIVM — apart from the destructiveness to every life they touch — including flat-out harassment they’ve sporadically perpetrated on me for years — is that they “incorporated” some of my interviews and correspondence on and off the record (after confiscating computers through bogus criminal, computer trespassing charges) with Jim Odato (former Albany Times Union Reporter) and others — into their “technology” or coursework. And did so in (what else could they but?) the most perverted manner imaginable.

    For instance, I shared that my sister, Gina, was in a state of “cognitive dissonance” when she died. Also that there were “emotional triggers” I believe were set by Keith et. al. over her lifetime association from the age of 13 with Keith and his “inner circle,” who experimented heavily on her and used her braintrust — her sincere, hard-won knowledge of Spiritualism, Buddhism and Eastern studies — albeit twisted through Keith’s deviant, devious grey matter — to further develop their evil “technology” even after it killed her — if one of them didn’t actually pull the triggers.

    So, now, it appears Barbara —and whomever else she thinks might or IS buying in — is changing historic facts to not only defend herself and the toxic “technology” that wreaked so much destruction on so many lives, but also to try to claim, redistribute ownership of Keith and Nancy’s poisonous formulas!

    The possible repercussions of taking this tact on the criminal cases, the civil cases, the media reports, the lives and psyche’s of the branding and other victims, on even Barbara herself is significant. Yet, Barbara seems to be “oblivious” to the potential impact.

    Call it the kind of “cognitive dissonance” Keith claimed (or threatened) sets in when anyone dares to leave him, call it latent “emotional triggers” Keith claimed he cures not sets — put Barabara on suicide watch if that’s the case here — but I call it lying to advance one’s own agenda at the sacrifice of others lives.

    • – apart from the destructiveness to every life they touch

      Whether that touch is direct or indirect, truer words could not be spoken.

  • Bouchey should really write a book.

    She is good at rewriting history.

    I was told by her personally in her living room, when she was recruiting me to leave NXIVM with the other eight women, that she knew about his entire stable of women. Now shes saying isher only knew about three.

    Bouchey’s storylines are not matching up. She was within the “inner circle” as she calls it.

    Bouchey said Raniere’s downfall was bringing women into ‘the fold” he was not controlling through sex / mind bending and he had to have better control or they turned on him like those who knew who Raniere was truly like.

    Bouchey helped to set up systems within NXIVM.

    What… was she a part of the money laundering or hide your assets system? Was she part of this is how your extract millions from your students system? Was she part of setting up the pyramid scheme?

    We know she was part of “let’s all lie about and support our Master system. Knowing he was a liar and cheating on his so called SOUL MATE for years. aft

    Bouchey became blinded by his powers. She didn’t mention this soft spoken gental man sent his other britches to do his punishment to Bouchey every time she would step out of line. Which was often and his stable was constantly doing their mind bending sessions with Bouchey because of her reactions every time a newer, younger, prettier gal pal came into his “fold” as Bouchey calls it.

    My money is on Bouchey is now trying to paint a pretty picture of LaLa land just to improve her image.

    There are so many other realities that can be exposed regarding Bouchey’s cognitive dissonance but I have a life to live today.

  • Barbara understood how noble he is. Despite Keith breaking up with her she still adores him. She is growing and after 9 years she realizes how great he is. She knows she was suppressive and money was her issue. Maybe one day she will again join us.
    The trial is in January he will be acquitted by February. Come back and join us now Barbara. He is your soul master. Don’t wait until the end times to realIze Keith is your all in all. You admitted in live television before the whole world you are in love with Keith. Come back and be our new Prefect !

    • Yeah, he is great. And her MONEY issue was, he took all of her hard earned stash (maybe for retirement?) for himself, and she had the nerve to object. Maybe she can now counsel him on Handling Adversity with Grace. Maybe someday she will re-join him – Haha! She is now free and does not need a false prophet.

      “Keith” is nobody’s “All”. He is all about himself.

      It’s easy to be tricked by a practiced liar and a cheat. Keith, did you ever earn one day’s honest pay in your sorry, deceptive, life?

      Most men would be ashamed to be what you are.

    • “money was her issue.” Pea Onyu
      After Raniere swindled her out of a million dollars I would think that money would be her issue.

      “The trial is in January” Pea Onyu
      The trial will be in June 2019 or even October 2019.
      This is a complex multinational RICO case,

      “he will be acquitted” Pea Onyu
      He will be found guilty and will rot in prison for the rest of his life.
      And Clare, Allison and Sara should rot in prison with him.

      “Come back and be our new Prefect !” Pea Onyu
      Pea, you should be the new Prefect.
      You are delusional enough.

      “you are in love with Keith” Pea Onyu
      And Keith is in love with himself.

    • It’s “normal” perhaps for those who are trapped in loveless marriages or relationships with someone they depend on financially, emotionally or otherwise to sustain themselves and/or their dependents.

      I don’t think it’s “normal” for anyone who really loves and cares for another in a romantic sense to willingly let that mutual bond of true, romantic love be intruded on.

      Further, I believe Keith cruelly used the desire for and expectation of a mutually exclusive relationship (at some point) with him — or with the fantasy of who he pretended to be — to manipulate many of his paramours at least initially.

    • Definitely not! I couldn’t believe it when I read that. She sort of made it sound “not that bad” by saying she only knew of three while they were together. ONLY three? I’m pretty sure I speak for most (normal, non-brainwashed) women when I say that simply one would be a dealbreaker.

    • I agree. IMO, anybody saying how great NXIVM is still has serious mental issues from their involvement with it.

      • – I was integral in helping create the company…plus he loved me allegedly…I couldn’t tell

        “I COULDN’T TELL” says it all.

        How do you believe someone is your soulmate and yet, you “couldn’t tell” if they love you. I mean it’s just absurd.

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