Kristin Kreuk at Necker Island

Mathematician makes further, enlarged computations on Sultan’s devotion to Kristin Kreuk

[Editor’s note: The following, done by a mathematician, using the moniker “Behold,” once before made a marvelous computation of the volume of Sultan of Six’s devotion to actress Kristin Kreuk. In his latest post, he computes the time spent in devotional ardor to the taxpayer funded Canadian actress. Readers should understand and be aware that Behold’s calculations are based on a speculative premise that Sultan is offering his devotion in a measured and quantifiable way. This has never been positively ascertained.]

By Behold

Dearest readers;

A follow up to the article “Mathematician computes devotion Sultan has for Kristin Kreuk”.

We have already established a reasonable time frame of Sultan of Six AKA Spanky’s first spank to Kristin Kreuk (from 2005) a reasonable weekly spank estimate (twice a week) and a reasonable estimate of the amount of low testosterone jizz he has jizzed out (3.70 pounds).

Now, we will examine how long Spanky has spent actually spanking it to his dream spank.

A likely photoshopped picture of Kristin Kreuk, the object of defense of the chivalrous Sultan of Six.


An online website by the name “askmen” conducted a survey to find out the jizzing habits of 4000 men.

46% claimed they shoot their loads after 10-15 minutes of spanking.


According to research by porn website “PornHub”:

“In 2017, PornHub visitors spent nine minutes clicking through just nine pages”


This would mean hand monkeys find the porn they like and spank it raw within nine minutes. So less than ten minutes of spanking.


So what does all this mean in relation to Sultan Of Spank? .

If Spanky takes the minimal amount of spank-time to shoot out his gross load, (less than 9 minutes according to PornHub research) and 10 minutes according to the askmen survey of 4000 men, (we’ll say nine minutes) and Spanky has been spanking it TWICE weekly to Kristin Kreuk for FOURTEEN YEARS, it means Spanky has spanked it to Kristin Kreuk:

– 18 minutes a week.

– 1 Hour, 11 Minutes and 59 Seconds a month

– 14 Hours and 24 Minutes a year

– 201 Hours, 35 Minutes and 59 Seconds over fourteen years


For perspective, the Spank Phantom has spent:

8 Days, 9 Hours and 36 Minutes stroking his little banana slug to Kristin Kreuk.



And for all we know, Sultan Of Spank has spanked it to Kristin Kreuk since BEFORE 2005, MORE than twice a week and perhaps ejaculates MORE than the estimated quarter of a teaspoon of jizz every spank.


Day turns to night. Night turns to day. And that is A LOT of spanking.

The taxpayer funded actress is the object of adoration at times it seems by Sultan of Six.

About the author

Frank Parlato


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  • Article written by a jealous girlfriend folks..? lol Kristin tends to get this kind of reaction by jealous angry mean girls.
    Talk about spermazoa overload on the brain…like constantly. Sad….

  • “Anonymous for Kristin” is “SultanOfSix”, the subject of this article.

    He has been stalking Kristin Kreuk online for probably fifteen years.

    He is a Pakistani “man” in his fifties or older, unmarried, working in IT and may have aspergers.

    He uses a number of aliases to hide behind to defend Kristin Kreuk from criticism regarding her deep NXIVM role. Some of them include “Scarrom” “WasabiSteak” “SoSalty” “Karl Basset” “Jesse” “Anonymous for Kristin” and others.

    Kristin Kreuk as part of her NXIVM role created “Girls By Design” to lure in teen girls to the NXIVM cult. At least one of them was and is now a DOS slave.

    “Anonymous for Kristin” created ANOTHER alias called “Jesse” pretending to be a CHILD to interact with little girls on Girls By Design. He has also defended pedophilia by saying if the girl can get pregnant, then it is not pedophilia.

    People with connections to NXIVM who have said anything remotely critical of Kristin Kreuk come onto the receiving end of LONG obsessive rants by “Anonymous for Kristin” pretending they don’t know what they are talking about.

    There was an old anti-NXIVM blog called Saratoga In Decline fronted by John Tigue, a man who revealed Kristin Kreuk was on Necker Island for a secret NXIVM cult meeting where they planned illegal money laundering operations and he also revealed Kristin Kreuk was named in a criminal lawsuit as a likely defendant by Joseph O’Hara.

    Both men, Tigue and O’Hara have been on the receiving end of “Anonymous for Kristin’s” obsessive rants. He stalked the comments section of Saratoga In Decline (and was laughed at by John Tigue) and stalked Joseph O’Hara on Frank Report, telling this man that he knows more about the lawsuit O’Hara filed.

    Joseph O’Hara claimed he knows who “SultanOfSix” aka “Anonymous for Kristin” is. He claims he was having sex with an older NXIVM member and he even knows what camera the stalker uses/used. He claims he recognized him from the comments of Saratoga In Decline. Perhaps the stalker joined NXIVM to stalk Kristin Kreuk in person.

    If “SultanOfSix” leaves ANOTHER LONG response, let it be known, he is the subject of this article.

    • Interesting profile but it’s fake lol. Though it good to see a post not containing subjects of reproductive material and sex constantly.
      Keep it up Clyde. 🙂

      • “Anonymous for Kristin” aka “SultanOfSix” is STILL pretending!!!

        Cry sum more spanky!!!

        Call the whambulance!!!

      • You sound like a angry little brown girl!!!…..Go home for your curry, your brown ma ma is calling!!!..ClydeSpank.

        Cry some more spanky!!! Call the whambulance!!!

        • Lol. No thanks mean’re driving the Wambulance. And use it for a home down by the river.
          Better wash it Clyde…;)

        • No thanks Mean girl. You’re driving the whambulance..and use as a home down by the river.
          Better wash it Clyde. 😉

          • Mean girl is so wrong…..doesn’t even know…lol Now wash than whambulance

          • The worthless lonely stalker brown mean girl can’t stop stalking a cult member who will never let him fuck her!!! He stalked her in Albany!!!

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