Arvoice Dear Auntie Column
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Dear Auntie Answers Questions on Love and Relationships

                                  Dear Auntie


                                  By D. Scott


Dear Auntie: This year I struggled a lot with making basic things happen. Everyone says I’m depressed. I’m barely able to get to work and get out of bed. I don’t have kids but I have a lot of nieces and nephews. I wanted to make this Christmas special but I just don’t have the money right now. Even with the delay in having to pay rent (I’ve been paying on time) it wouldn’t be enough. What do you suggest to help me still be able to give and see the kids happy? I don’t have any ideas nor much money this year. The oldest is 12 and the youngest is 3.

Richard from Alaska


Dear Richard: This year is a tough year all over the world. Financially we are preparing for the height of a recession. The housing market will crash. The rate of homelessness and food demand will be high. It is great that you still have it in you to give anything at all this holiday season. Especially since you don’t have kids of your own.

Due to the fact that you appear to live in Alaska, depression is likely upon you. Lack of sunlight, fresh air and the ability to entertain yourself could all be causing this. There are therapists and doctors that will even see you online now. Some operate on a sliding scale. Try to seek out help in your area. We just started the winter months. It doesn’t get better for a while.

As for the children, remember they are children. Most of them won’t remember much. If you ask my son he will tell you we never went to Disney world. We went every other weekend when we lived in Florida. He doesn’t remember. As a parent or relative we try to give the children things WE would like them to have. Possibly because we didn’t have it. I’m here to tell you kids don’t care.

First thing is to decide how much you have to spend in totality. If you have 10 children to buy for and the budget is $100 total, they each get a $10 gift. You would be surprised what $10 buys that would appease a child. Coloring books, crayons, pen and pencil sets, little lotions, brushes, soap sets etc. The expectation from children is never what we as adults place on them. Most times they are happy to open something from you and spend time with you. The holidays are about giving. Nobody said to give what you don’t have. Maybe this year because of the years prior, you may be the recipient of some awesome gifts. May you be blessed for your efforts this year. Happy holidays.


Dear Auntie: Going into the new year do you have any rituals or traditions in place to ensure a good year? I’m trying to make a list so I can be specific. It seems like I haven’t had a good year in years. I’m stagnant. I have so many things I want to do but I’m being held back I think. Tell me how you get what you want out of the new year. I’m not doing something right obviously.

Shondria from Buffalo


Dear Shondria: You are asking me what I do as tradition or ritual. Clearly you haven’t been watching me on the @tinyandbrave Instagram lives. I do not discuss my manifestations until after they come. That’s one way to get a blessing blocked. A tradition is not a ritual in this country, most of the time. My tradition is like many. Black eyed peas, cornbread and greens on New Year’s Eve. There is significance in that. Clearly this last year was horrible for a lot of people. I will not be eating that this year. Probably going to eat something sweet and soft for the new year to be the same. 2020 was harsh.

Stagnation in my world comes from either a karmic debt owed or not being in alignment. Sometimes you’re not being held back. Sometimes you’re being lazy and won’t make a choice that will better your life. Some of y’all allow paperwork or a rejection stop you from doing something. Some of you spend too much time worrying about relationships instead of focusing on your relationship with money. Focus on whether or not you are in alignment. Do you think the universe will allow you to have something you weren’t sanctioned to have? It doesn’t work that way. Sometimes a NO is because that’s not what you’re supposed to do. Sometimes a NO can be to determine how bad you want something and are you willing to work to get it.

The good news is that you are writing down your goals. That’s how to start manifesting. Be specific. Make the list detailed enough that there is no such thing as extra money or extra time. Sacrifice is also necessary. Make a list of your habits. Habit is a nasty way of saying ritual. How are you blessing your body, mind and others? Can your rituals be the cause of why you can’t get over a hurdles? Are you being stingy to people that you could be blessing?

There are a ton of variables as to why your manifestations aren’t working. Take the time to check yourself as you write. At the end of each year I think you will be pleased to look at that tedious list. It will show how far you came and what you’ve achieved. Even something as simple as making yourself a priority will change the energy of your request. My hope is that you always start each list off with gratitude for the pen and paper you write with. Then move into starting each day with gratitude. Being thankful for the now is the number one way to receive later. Happy New year luv.

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