Death-Defying Stunts

Harkening to an era of whimsical, vaudevillian daredevilism, on Sept. 23 French high-wire artist Didier Paquette strolled across a wire suspended between the towers of the 345-foot Liberty Bank Building. Too bad those buzzkills at the NY Dept. of Labor made him wear a safety wire.

Orgies

Firefighter officials on Sept. 24 pulled the plug on a “sex party” that a local swingers group intended to host at the South Lockport Volunteer Fire Hall. The event, initially booked as a “family party,” did however go off as scheduled thanks to the generous donation of the AV offices…just kidding.

Pink Slips

I know we promised not to mention him in this column again but this is just too good to ignore. On Sept. 27 the Buffalo Bills mercifully euthanized the Trent Edwards era for good. While his mid-season release surprised many, for once I think a layoff has actually left WNY for the better.

Freedom to Pee

A city judge on Sept. 27 dismissed charges against a 65-year-old man arrested after using an NFTA public restroom despite not being a passenger. In what the judge called a “miscarriage of justice,” Edsil Cook was acquitted of multiple charges thanks to testimony contrary to the officer’s report.

Ohhhhhhh Snap!

After The View co-host Joy Behar low-blowed Carl Paladino about his illegitimate daughter on air Sept. 27, campaign manager Michael Caputo shot back, dropping this gem, “the only person here who’s illegitimate is Joy Behar’s hairstylist.” That’s a pretty sassy remark from such a macho campaign.

Cultural agencies deemed “regionally significant”—and thus worthy of receiving economic aid—by Erie County Executive Chris Collins according to pre-budget reports by the Buffalo News on Sept. 29. The 10 agencies will receive the same funding they received in previous years, totaling $4.4 million while all others will get nothing.