Kristi Noem responded Tuesday to a report published by the Daily Mail and New York Post claiming that her husband Bryon Noem secretly lives a cross-dressing double life, saying in a statement that the family was caught completely off guard by the story.
“The family was blindsided by this,” Noem said, according to the New York Post, which first published her response.
The Daily Mail published photographs and explicit messages it says document Bryon Noem privately adopting a female persona.
National security experts cited in the reporting raised concerns that the alleged hidden life could have exposed Kristi Noem to potential blackmail during her tenure as Secretary of Homeland Security, a post she held from January 2025 until March 5, 2026, when President Trump fired her.
Bryon Noem has not publicly commented on the report. The Daily Mail and New York Post published their findings today, March 31, 2026.
Who Is Bryon Noem?
Bryon Noem, 56, was born and raised in Hamlin County, South Dakota, where his family operated a farm. He and Kristi met as teenagers at Hamlin High School in the late 1980s and married in a Watertown, South Dakota ceremony in 1992.
They have been married for 34 years and share three children: Kassidy, Kennedy, and Booker. The family still owns a cattle ranch near Castlewood, South Dakota, that has been in Bryon’s family for more than a century.
By profession, Bryon Noem runs Noem Insurance, a crop insurance agency he built after purchasing the insurance division of Bryant State Bank.
Financial disclosures filed during Kristi’s time in Congress and during her governorship list the insurance company and the family ranch as the household’s primary sources of income.
He became South Dakota’s first “First Gentleman” when Kristi was elected governor in 2019.
Bryon has largely avoided the national spotlight throughout his wife’s political rise.
He does not comment publicly on policy matters. He has been present at major events, her Senate confirmation hearings, inauguration ceremonies, and congressional testimonies, but rarely speaks.
When he does appear on social media, it is typically through posts about farm work, family milestones, or anniversary tributes to Kristi.
The Context Around This Report
Today’s story lands against an already extraordinary backdrop of scandal surrounding the Noems over the past several months.
For most of Kristi Noem’s tenure at DHS, Washington was consumed by allegations that she was engaged in an extramarital affair with Corey Lewandowski, a Trump political operative who served as a special government employee and de facto chief adviser at the department.
Multiple books, insider accounts, and news reports described the alleged relationship as the “worst-kept secret in Washington.” A forthcoming book by NBC News reporter Julia Ainsley, titled Undue Process: The Inside Story of Trump’s Mass Deportation Program, quoted a Customs and Border Protection official as saying of Noem and Lewandowski, “They don’t hide it.”
Both Noem and Lewandowski repeatedly and categorically denied the allegations.
The situation reached a breaking point on March 4, 2026, when Noem appeared before the House Judiciary Committee. With Bryon seated directly behind her in the hearing room, California Rep. Sydney Kamlager-Dove asked her directly, “At any time during your tenure as director of the Department of Homeland Security, have you had sexual relations with Corey Lewandowski?”
Noem called the question “tabloid garbage” and declined to directly deny it. Bryon had left the room minutes before the question was asked to catch a flight back to South Dakota.
Bryon’s family members subsequently told the New York Post that he had been humiliated by the entire ordeal but would not leave the marriage due to his Christian faith.
“He said he decided about 20 years ago that it was his calling from God to support her in whatever she decided to do,” one family member said. “Bryon is a Christian man, and he believes that marriage is forever,” said another.
On March 5, Trump fired Noem via a Truth Social post and reassigned her as Special Envoy for the Shield of the Americas, a Western Hemisphere security initiative.
She became the first Cabinet secretary removed from office in Trump’s second term.
Sources close to the White House said her refusal to deny the Lewandowski affair under oath was the final factor in Trump’s decision, compounding existing controversies including a $220 million taxpayer-funded advertising contract that prominently featured Noem, the use of more than $300 million on private luxury jets, and her handling of the fatal shootings of two US citizens by federal immigration agents in Minneapolis in January 2026.
The Blackmail Question
National security experts cited in today’s Daily Mail report raised concerns about the implications of Bryon Noem’s alleged hidden life relative to Kristi Noem’s former position as head of the Department of Homeland Security.
The argument, as characterized in the reporting, is that a senior Cabinet official whose spouse has an undisclosed personal life of this kind could potentially be vulnerable to leverage or blackmail by foreign adversaries or domestic actors with knowledge of that information.
Security clearance vetting processes exist precisely to surface information that could create such vulnerabilities.
Whether Bryon’s alleged private behavior was known to intelligence or security officials at any point during Kristi Noem’s DHS tenure has not been reported.
Kristi Noem’s response focused on the family’s surprise at the story rather than its substance.
She did not address the national security dimension of the reporting.
Kristi Noem, 54, is currently serving as Special Envoy for the Shield of the Americas.
Bryon Noem is reportedly spending most of his time in South Dakota managing the family’s insurance business and ranch operations.
Public records and business filings indicate both enterprises continue to operate near Castlewood.
The couple has not announced any change to their marital status. Bryon has not spoken publicly about either the Lewandowski affair allegations or today’s cross-dressing report.
